Don’t Let This Ruin Your Life

Hey My Fellow Travelers

So a lot of us seem to think that going overseas is gonna make all of our problems disappear. But for those of us who are more experienced at living overseas and traveling, we’ve seen how living overseas can actually make your problems worse

Traveling overseas can even ruin your life, man

Let’s talk about this and also talk about how we can avoid getting our life ruined. Let me tell you about this one German guy I knew who was here in China for a while

Now, the first day I met this guy, I kinda knew he was a little crazy. So on one of the first meetings when I hungout with this guy he got really drunk and he lost his phone in a taxi.

And he was new to China, so he didn’t know anything, and he was basically completely screwed without his phone. So I spent the next two hours trying to get the contact information of the taxi driver whose car he left his phone in. We finally got his phone back, but it was really annoying

And on another night… man…..let me tell you this crazy thing that he did.

Here’s what happened – so him and I went partying one night, and we went to this Chinese nightclub called Jellyfish. Jellyfish was one of the most popular nightclubs for foreigners to go to and meet Chinese girls who speak English.

It’s a club in China but it’s the club that plays a lot of foreign music, so a lot of non-Chinese people would go there, and then you’d get a lot of girls who were interested in dating foreigners who would go there.

So that night we went partying, and at the end of the night he took a Chinese girl home with him. Now this Chinese girl, she was a little bit too skinny for my tastes, but she was pretty, and she was dressed pretty hot and sexy that night.

So anyways the next day he told me that he went home with this girl, and I asked him how it went, and he told me that……. how can I put this in the most PG way possible? He told me that he EXPLODED inside of her, multiple times that night, with no condom….. I think you guys get my understanding….

Now I asked him why he did that, and he said that he liked her, and wanted her to be his girlfriend, and that he’d be happy if she was the mother of his kids. So he basically took a girl that he barely knew for 2 hours, and decided that he was gonna give her an 18 year German meal ticket, just because she’s a pretty girl.

I’ve heard from other German guys that it’s not easy to get girls in Germany- so I guess for him he wasn’t used to having hot chicks in his life, so the first one he gets he wants to get her pregnant. And the funny thing is that this Chinese girl ended up telling him that she didn’t want to see him anymore after that night, so he was sitting there looking all confused about that

Now, here’s the thing about this guy – because he has European features, there are certain types of Chinese girls who would think he’s handsome, and want to be his girlfriend. But here’s the thing – not EVERY girl would like him. Because, surprise surprise, not every girl is gonna like you, even if you’re a handsome guy (Trust me on that one guys haha)

You see, he had kind of an ego. One thing I found out about him is that when he was drunk he would text the phone of girls who rejected him – like for the girls who didn’t want to sleep with him, he would text them and send them all kinds of crazy, hateful messages, calling them all kinds of names. I’ll let you use your imagination about the kinds of messages he would send them, but basically they are things that would probably make you punch somebody in the mouth if they said them to your sister

Now, if he was in Germany doing that, it eventually would have caught up with him, and he probably would have got his a$s beat, or put on blast on social media. But because he’s in a foreign country China and he’s operating on the outside of Chinese society, he was able to get away with that behavior and not get punished for it. I think he would have eventually got punished for doing that in China, but I guess he just got lucky in that it never happened

Funny story – last thing about this guy – during the pandemic, he traveled to Thailand, and ended up getting locked out of China when China closed it’s borders, so he was basically kicked out of the university he was studying at, and while he was in Thailand he got a Thai girl pregnant. Crazy guy.

And this story is a good example of how someone’s behavior can cause them to spiral out of control in all kinds of ways that f*cks their life up really badly

But these are some of the kinds of guys that you are gonna meet when you are living this overseas lifestyle, man. A lot of us have deep emotional issues that we bring with us overseas

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By the way, I’m currently offering consulting for those interested in traveling to and living in China!

Topics that we can cover during the consultation call include:

➡️In-depth information about the women (especially Russian and Chinese women) in China

➡️Understanding Chinese culture

➡️Job suggestions

➡️Recommendations on what cities to visit

➡️Any other topic that I feel I can give you solid guidance on

If you are interested in getting advice about life in China that is tailored to your specific situation, just message me using the “Contact Us” page (or send an email to danny@flightmadness.com), and we can discuss the details of your consultation

Looking forward to hearing from you!

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Here’s the thing, y’all. When you are living in your own country, there is a system of checks and balances that almost everybody follows.

For example, in America, if you’re acting like a crazy antisocial person, there’s a good chance that somebody around you is gonna let you know and check you when you get out of line. That way you can adjust your behavior and act more like a civilized citizen

Now there’s good and bad things about this, but that’s a topic for another newsletter. The main point is that, in other countries, because you’re a foreigner, the local people there might not recognize your weirdness, so you may never get feedback on it. So you might be out here doing crazy, antisocial stuff that could ruin your life, and nobody ever tells you

Trust me y’all, I meet guys all the time who are FREAKING weird, who I KNOW in their country would be kind of a loser outcast. But the local people in these countries might not recognize the weirdness these guys have.

So for example, if they are talking to an American, if he acts kind of strange, they might just ignore it and think that all Americans are like that, “That’s just how Americans are”. So nobody ever says anything, unless you are dealing with a local person who has a lot of experience with foreigners

So these guys never really fix their problems, and they might start engaging in increasingly crazy behavior. Like, that German guy, because he’s kind of handsome, I guess that he got enough action from the ladies that he never felt the need to work on himself, to become a better person. So he never had to look in the mirror and realize like “Man, I’m kind of an idiot psychopath.”

And that’s the situation that a lot of us are in as foreigners when we go over to new countries. Because we are exotic, we might be considered more attractive, and get more benefits there than our own country. And we also don’t get called out as often when we are doing stuff that is freaking weird

And I’m not gonna lie, when I left America, I also had a lot of unresolved issues and anger- towards the people in my past- the people I went to school with, towards my family, etc. But here’s the thing – I knew I had problems, and that I needed to fix them.

A lot of guys seem to think that they don’t have any problems, and that the rest of the world is the problem. But if you’re bringing your same mental problems from your country over to a new country, how is the world gonna be any different? How is the world gonna be different when you’re the same? And you might end up creating situations where your life is ruined

You gotta be able to look at yourself in the mirror and handle all your BS before it ruins your life. And to do that, you need to understand yourself

One book that is useful for helping to understand yourself is “Rediscovery of Life” by Anthony de Mello.

One thing this book emphasizes is the importance of awareness and acceptance. You need to be aware of your emotions, and you gotta be able to admit and accept the things about yourself that maybe aren’t that nice.

So if you are the kind of guy who has some deep anger issues and resentment towards women (maybe you got rejected a lot by women in the past), it would probably be good for you to admit that to yourself. Because admitting that to yourself can help you become self-aware so that you don’t go around unleashing your anger at every woman that you meet (like that German guy haha)

Instead you can work on getting those emotions under control, and coming to terms with the bad experiences you’ve had with women

Another lesson that book offers is the importance of being detached from emotions. Now, detachment from emotions doesn’t mean that you try to push down your emotions or run away from them. It just means that you try to not let your emotions control you to the point where you can’t control your actions.

Because if you can’t control your actions you might make decisions that aren’t good for you or the people around you

One metaphor that the book gives is to see your negative emotions like a black cloud in the sky. Rather than saying “I am the black cloud of negative emotions”, you distance yourself from it and its like your down on the ground looking up at the black cloud pass in the sky. So instead of me getting all caught up in my emotions, I just view the emotions as a cloud that will eventually pass

A final lesson from the book that I want to bring up is that it recommends you investigate your emotional problems, like the way that a detective investigates a crime. Like pretend that you are Sherlock Holmes, and you’re trying to figure out what’s going on with yourself.

You know, if you realize that you’ve got some kind of deep anger or hatred in your heart- think about, where did that come from? What caused it? Is it a good idea to let that past experience continue to haunt you like a Halloween ghost?

When you find out where your emotional problems started, you’ll have an easier time fixing them. Don’t be one of those guys who runs to a new country to escape your problems, and then ends up causing even bigger problems for yourself

All right, that’s all for today, y’all. I hope y’all enjoyed hearing some stories and lessons from my time in China. I want y’all to remember- you’ve only got one life, man. Don’t ruin it.

See ya next time

-Danny