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Hey my fellow travelers
So believe it or not, not everybody is your friend when you’re out here traveling. Some people might even pretend to be your friend, and then they stab you in the back when you’re least expecting it
Check this out- a few years ago I was chasing after this Chinese girl. I wasn’t trying really hard to get her, but I was interested in her enough that I offered to take her out on a date
She was getting ready to study abroad in the UK, so I had my fingers crossed, hoping that I could maybe possibly get some action before she leaves
So I took her on a basic date. There was a big university nearby, and we walked around through that. And that was cool, but when we were at the restaurant, that’s when some BS popped off
Now there was this British guy from the UK that I knew. I had seen him around the city a few times, and him and I had spoken, and we were on friendly terms. Him and I weren’t super close to the point where we were hanging out, but I kinda thought we were friends, because he was one of those kinds of guys that I would always say “Hi” to.
I thought we were kinda on the way to becoming bros……
But lemme tell you what this SOB did.
So we’re at the restaurant, and me and the girl had finished eating, and we were walking towards the cash register, and I was gonna pay. This British guy walks in, and I say hey to him, and I introduce my girl. And then I say goodbye, because we are about to pay and leave.
So my girl is standing there, and I turn around to head to the cash register to pay. And you know what this guy does, this snake. While I got my back turned, he goes up to my girl and asks for her contact information. I mean, I turned my back for like 2 seconds, and as soon as I did that, he just jumps at the opportunity to ask my girl for her contact information.
He didn’t even try to chat her up or pretend like he had any other intentions- he just went straight for the digits. In China we use an app called Wechat, so he asked her for her WeChat information
Now here’s the thing- this girl, she wasn’t even my girl, because I was still in the process of trying to get her. And my game wasn’t as tight back then, so I was trying to be kinda indirect, because I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to work my magic on this girl before she left to study abroad
So anyways, I guess because she thought he was my friend, that maybe he didn’t have any bad intentions. Or maybe she thought us foreigners are like that, because you know a Chinese girl might not understand how us foreigners act, so she might just go along with whatever she thinks we normally do.
So basically, she didn’t reject him, and they exchanged WeChat contact information. Here in China it’s pretty common for people who barely know each other to exchange Wechats, so I guess in her mind it wasn’t a big deal.
So I’m basically over here looking like a clown paying for the meal while my girl is exchanging contact information with this guy who I thought was my friend 🤡
Now I know some guys feel comfortable letting their male friends be connected with and have the contact information of their girlfriends, but I don’t get down like that. If you’re my friend, there ain’t no reason to be texting my girl bruh
And this guy, I could just tell by the look on his face, he KNEW what he was doing. He knew that he was crossing me, stabbing me in the back, by going for my girl’s contact information when I had my back turned.
So that situation really shocked me, because I thought “Dang bro I thought you were my friend man….. what are you doing?!”
You’re telling me you so desperate for women that you gotta try to take a girl I’m with…… and you do it when I’m standing right there in the same room, like I’m not gonna notice?!
And then I look you in the face and you know and I know you’re betraying me, and you got this stupid smirk on your face. Like damn man. We’re not friends anymore….. get out of my face, dork!
✈️
You want to learn from my mistakes so that you can enjoy an amazing time in China? Well, I’m currently offering consulting for those interested in traveling to and living in China!
Topics that we can cover during the consultation call include:
➡️In-depth information about the women (especially Russian and Chinese women) in China
➡️Understanding Chinese culture
➡️Job suggestions
➡️Recommendations on what cities to visit
➡️Any other topic that I feel I can give you solid guidance on
If you are interested in getting advice about life in China that is tailored to your specific situation, just message me using the “Contact Us” page (or send an email to danny@luxologylifestyle.com), and we can discuss the details of your consultation
Looking forward to hearing from you!
🏆
And that situation right there reminded me of something that I’ve learned many times before – at the end of the day, everything is about self-interest. And if the person that you are dealing with feels that it’s in their best self-interest to knock you upside the head and take what’s yours – well, you better be wearing a helmet, buddy. Because the thirst is real out here, man.
People will betray you in a heartbeat. That guy that you think is your bro will toss you in the river over a pretty girl that he met 5 seconds ago. It’s sad but true, man. And it’s something that you should keep in mind
Because, here’s the thing- when things are going really good, and everybody is happy and eating and smiling at each other, it can be really easy to forget these basic things about human nature. The fact is that people are selfish, and they care about what they want more than what you want.
If your friend is hungry and starving for women, and you leave your women standing around him, looking like a tasty steak, don’t be surprised if your friend start macking all of your girl. You see, that’s one reason why I don’t hangout with guys who aren’t good with women. Like, if you don’t know how to talk to women, and you are desperate for women, we can’t be friends bro.
Because I already know as soon as I bring my girl around you, you not gonna know how to act, and you might end up betraying me the same way that the British guy tried to betray me. I’ve seen it happen so many times.
That’s why when you’re out here in these streetz, you gotta make sure you understand people. Don’t think that just because you’re overseas living this travel lifestyle that you can just let your guard down and not have to worry about people anymore.
So there’s one book that I highly recommend for helping you to understand people, and helping you to be aware of their potential dark side. It’s called The Laws Of Human Nature, by Robert Greene
Now I’m not gonna lie, this is a freaking gigantic book, about 624 pages. But, trust me guys, it’s 624 pages of straight fire, so it’s definitely worth reading if you can make the time for it. But I know y’all ain’t gonna read that, so let me give you the information you need
So Chapter 5 of the book is called “The Law of Covetousness.” You know that section from the bible that talks about “Thou shall not covet” – yeah, that’s what we’re talking about here.
The chapter is basically about how a lot of people have things that they want so badly, it can cause them to do things that are kinda evil
It’s referred to as “The Dark Side of Desire”. That dark side appears when a person wants something so badly that they are willing to betray and manipulate the people around them, just so they can try to get that thing they want.
And they might even try to rationalize their behavior…. like they would lie to themselves and say that their evil behavior is justified – they might even try to paint you as the bad guy. Because they don’t want to admit to themselves that they are such a sh*tty person
So here are 3 quick steps you can take to protect yourself from other people’s dark side
Step 1 – You Gotta Build Self-Awareness: You gotta understand the things that you value, and know what things will piss you off. so for me, when it comes to friendship, I value loyalty and trust. When someone violates my loyalty and trust, I’m not gonna be happy about that
For Step 2– You Gotta Maintain Boundaries: One of the things about boundaries is that you gotta let other people know that you have them, so that way they don’t freakin step over the line and ruin your relationship. So that means you gotta be proactive and tell the people around you what is and isn’t Ok for them to be doing in the relationship they have with you.
So for that British guy, if I had ever become closer friends with him, it probably would have been good to tell him – “Hey, when I bring hot girls around you, you keep your hands to yourself, playboy. Don’t be over here trying to peel my girls off of me behind my back.”
And finally, for step 3: You Gotta Practice Emotional Resilience- that means that you need to actively work at becoming an emotionally stronger person. because at the end of the day, you can’t 100% control other people’s actions.
But you can work to lower the damage that they do to your mental piece of mind. Because no matter what goes on around you, maintaining your peace of mind is the most important thing
We all know it sucks when the people that you trusted betray you and stab you in the back, but if you follow these lessons, you can reduce the chances of that happen, and also be more prepared for when it does happen
All right guys, that’s all for today. hopefully you enjoyed today’s newsletter, and got some value from it.
Remember: there are snakes everywhere, so you gotta make sure you stay aware.
See you next time
-Danny Flight
YouTube @theflightmadness
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